I am still me .. !!🎭

With all the changes those needed to be, from within I am still me…

The job, the paychecks and the bills, the vicious cycle, that each month kills…

The love, the marriage and the house, life make me run like cat and mouse…

The God, the prayer and the peace, make me wonder when will I reach…

I loved to read, I loved to write, I still do, just not as much I might…

With all the Chaos, with all the pain, I still wait for the monsoon rain…

The dust may clear, the air may clean, a healthy life like I always dream…

The morning tea, the midnight supper, without a guilt of weight or sugar…

The hard I try, harder it gets, I pursue nonetheless without regrets….

I am still me, while the changes remain, making me who I am and who I can….

*******************************”

Thanks for reading..

Stay healthy stay happy..!!

काश मैं कविता होती.. 📖🎼

काश मैं कविता होती,
सबके मन में रहती, सबके मन का कहती !
 

काश मैं ज्योति होती,
सबको मार्ग दिखाती, चाहे खुद जलती जाती !
 

काश मैं आशा होती,
सबके मन में जाती, सबको हिम्मत दिलाती !
 

काश मैं भाषा होती,
मधुर वचन बन जाती, सबके मन को भाती !
 

काश मैं हवा होती,
बादल के संग बहती, किसी बंधन में ना रहती !
 

काश …

CH 7 Family: The Ultimate Support Group

Family accepts you no matter what is your situation. We might be soaring high on our career and life, or be beaten down by recession or physical injury. Family is always there to cheer or support. Whoever can’t do that for us, are actually just relatives or acquaintances, not family.

Family in most cases includes parents, siblings, spouse, children if there are any, close friends and pets. However it depends person to person who all come under this ultimate support group.

It is said that you will know your true friends in your worst times, well same is true for the family. Not always we find the support or happiness that we are looking for in the immediate biological relations. There are other emotions like fear of added liability, where children abandon their parents, risk to social reputation where parents hurt their children or simple jealousy where siblings don’t get along. We can’t change other people perspective, what we can do is to understand it, and set our expectations accordingly.

There are people we lovingly term as ‘family beyond blood’, friends that compliment or sometimes even substitute for family. They may be school friends, neighbourhood friends, College friends, office friends or acquaintances turned friends. There are generally common interests or common problems that create and strengthen the bonding, based on understanding and support. Our lives grow parallel, which gives a lot to relate with each other.

Last but not least are pets if you have any. They are the unconditional source of love and affection. No matter what you are going through in life and who have left you, pets will love you all the same. They do add a liability of as much of child, being dependent for food and comfort. But they return 10 times towards our general happiness and wellbeing.

Lastly, I want to add is like any other relation, the family also needs to be valued and nurtured. Although the family will forgive easily and will never hurt you. Yet it’s not wise to hurt or hate them if they fall short of expectations. It’s also our responsibility to love them unconditionally as we expect to be loved by them.

While Home is the base of happiness tower, Family is the iron and cement that holds it together. Will discuss managing the factors of happiness to help maintain a degree of happiness in upcoming posts.

Thanks for reading. Please share your views in comments.

Stay happy, stay tuned !!

CH 6

CH8

Ch 05 THE ‘SOCIAL’ (un)HAPPINESS PART 2 : EXPECTATIONS

“Expectations Hurts”! .

We live with a web of expectations, and they come in various varieties. There are expectations, we have with the rest of the world, be it our spouse, family, friends, employer, government, UNO, and off-course with GOD. Then there are expectations that the world has with us, be it our job title, work performances, lifestyle, the kid’s life or even the pet’s life. The world, starting from our family to the stranger on social media, need us to be in a certain way, which in most cases is different than what we have managed.

We get irritated, sometimes even angry when our expectation with others is not fulfilled in the way we wanted them to be. It can be a paid service that does not come out as it should have, or some of our trusted friend or family did not stand for us when we needed them. The cause of pain here is not what other’s have done, its the expectation that we had with them to do. So essentially we our-self are the cause of our pain.

Similarly, at times the world expects us to do something we don’t like or relate with. Such situations result in a series of disappointments both for us and for the person imposing the desire. This can happen both at work and at home. Even our loved ones can have misplaced expectations from us. Honesty is the only way out, it may cause temporary discomfort, but will save a lot of pain in the long run.

The next type and most impacting expectations are those that we have with ourselves. We want to become like someone, top the class, reach a certain job status, buy a house, improve our health, learn to play the guitar, tour the world, love someone with all our heart, make our parents happy or perhaps do it all. The list is long and ever evolving. These wishes keep us moving and there is nothing that can please us better than achieving them. It is not always easy to attain all you want, at the time you want it. The key to happiness is to have the expectations balanced with our abilities, pace and requirements. It’s perfectly alright to be content if our needs are fulfilled, our talents are utilised, and a certain something is not achieved yet. After all, we need to have something to look forward to.

Stay happy, keep Dreaming!!

CH4

CH6

Ch 02. Why focus on Happiness at all ?

Before heading to the factors of happiness in details, let’s talk about why at all, are we trying to work on an emotion?

Well to start, first we have to acknowledge that happiness is not just an emotion. It’s also part of overall well-being. When we are happy, it makes us feel good and somewhere we feel healed, emotionally or psychologically. This indirectly improve our physical health or at least we want to improve it positively, by taking conscious efforts.

Happiness can be a result of one or more of various feelings. We could experience happiness when we are excited or satisfied or empowered or justified or respected or just healthy. The list is endless as it’s anything that can make us feel good. These are all reactive happiness, that means we are happy when something good happens.

What we are trying to accomplish here is approch to proactive happiness. What I mean by it, is first we become happy by choice and then make the good happen. There is no magic and it won’t solve any problems by itself. What this can do to us, is give us better presence of mind, probably little more confidence and a drive to relish every small sept that we succeed to take.

I believe, I made the point and I can proceed with analysing the factors of our happiness from next post.

Thanks for reading. Please provide your comments below.

Stay happy, Stay healthy.

CH 01

CH 03

The handicapped fish…

My husband have great love for aquariums and fishes. We have 4 fishes, they live happily in their modest abode, swimming is all directions, spreading happiness.

Pets can be real stress buster, with all their innocence and basic need of love and food. Fishes are least maintenance pets. You can watch an aquarium for endless hours without getting bored.

One unfortunate day one of the red cap got caught in the filter suction. My husband rescued her from the filter but she lost her forearm (front right wing) and the injury left her weak and dis-balanced. We placed her in a separate bowl with extra medicine hoping to help her heal.

We monitored her, she was alive, breathing but not trying to move. Next few days her situation didn’t change. We had to lift her up and take to the food which she would feed on. Her wound started to heal. But she won’t move on her own.

After a week I started to think that probably she is lacking motivation to move. She still have four other wings and a long tail in more or less perfect condition. But she was not making enough effort to learn swimming with her imbalanced body.

I am no expert on fish psychology but may be she was too focused on her one broken wing or depressed from the fact that she have to stay apart from her friends. The fact was her friends would have killed her while she was not able to defend herself by moving around. So putting her back was not an option.

I tried giving her a little physiotherapy by putting her in a tub with more flat surface and chasing her around in the water. Well she did responded by swimming to avoid me, yet without registering the fact that she could do the same without me chasing her. May be she is just lazy. After all she gets her food in her mouth without lifting a wing.

She is still recovering and I am still hopeful to rehabilitate her with her friends. But unless she make some efforts of her own, it seems quite distant.

In our life we often have something that goes wrong and we tend to focus all our energies towards feeling sad and low about it. While ignoring many other aspects of life that can lift our spirits. A little effort in right direction may probably help balance the loss and put us back on track. Also there are always friends or family ready to help you bounce back. Never loose hope, never loose faith and don’t become lazy.

stay healthy, stay happy !!!